Day-to-day life – Page 3 – The SMO's stories

When Mama gets a man cold

January 2, 2017 Christine Cogger

I spent the first day of 2017 in bed with what can only be described as a Man Cold. Feverish, sniffly, tired, general malaise. What a way to kick off the year! I felt sorry for myself and thus relied on the kids to take care of themselves (foreshadowing: the kitchen is something else this morning).

Anyway. As I lay there is some kind of fever delirium, I mentally went through the various stages of Mama’s Man Cold (MMC).

Sidebar: I came up with a gazillion ideas as I lay there in a fog. None of which I can remember today.

Step 1. The Inkling

December 31 started off like any other day. A bit tired, maybe. That’s not all that unusual. But as the day wore on, I knew. That feeling at the back of your throat… the deepening fatigue… uh oh.

By the time we were expected at friends for NYE, I was clutching a box of tissues and celebrating with peppermint tea. Woo.

Step 2. Denial

Me at 8:30pm: “If I just take this Nyquil and go to bed early, I’ll be right as rain in the morning.”

Total fallacy.

Step 3. Resistance

We had big plans to ski fresh tracks on New Years Day. We were going to kick of 2017 with bacon and a full day of skiing. Up dark and early, I told myself I was ok. I packed my Tylenol and a box of tissues. I got this, right?

By 10am, I feebly told the kids we were going home. Mama couldn’t hack it. Also, my eyes were watering so badly I couldn’t see #safetyfirst.

Step 4. Acceptance

Fine. I’m sick. Once home, I crawled into bed and let the kids fend for themselves. One of those days when you lie in bed floating in and out of sleep, but still with an ear towards what is happening in the rest of the house (are they fighting? eating? breaking things?) I don’t venture downstairs, knowing I’m better off in bed and that they are ok. Somewhat.

Step 5. Recruitment

The dog never leaves my side, and a few times the kids check on me. Actually, it’s more like they can’t figure out what’s going on. They are wary: they stand at the door and wonder why I’m just a lump in bed: “Are you going to get up… at all?” They can’t seem to get used to the idea that I’m not hovering nearby. Eventually, they come close enough to sit on the bed with me. Anja makes me toast. I have helpers.

I sleep for 14 hours.

Step 6. Recovery

Mama’s version of the man cold cannot extend past 24hours. The house and children may not survive. I get up, get dressed and face the day, still clutching my box of tissues.

On the bright side, at least I got my annual MMC over with early this year.

Day-to-day life, Family

2016: Facts, favourites and fails

December 31, 2016December 31, 2016 Christine Cogger

I love a good challenge. Tell me do something, I likely will shrug and be non-committal. Challenge me to do the exact same thing? Well, it’s on. Also, I left it to the last possible day, because I like to live life on the edge.

A few of us decided to recap 2016 and share it (hence, the challenge). I’ve been trying to come up with 16 distinct events to write about for 2016… and it would appear my brain has taken 2016 and smushed it all into one big memory. Nevertheless, I’ll try to break it down. In no particular order. With the assistance of photos. Like that book report you try to write for the book you didn’t really read.

16. Mistakes

I made a lot of mistakes in 2016. And in 2015. And 2014… you get the drift. I suspect I’ll make many more in 2017 – but the beauty is that I like to think that I learn a little something from these mistakes. And I try not to make the same one twice. We’ll call this one a #fact.

15. Friendships

They make my world go ’round. From the day-to-day folks who keep me sane, to those I’ve forged with like-minded people from afar, I hope that 2017 will build on 2016. Total #favourite.

14. Challenges

I’m not afraid of setting myself up for failure; it feels like I do it on a daily basis! But the older I get, the more willing I am to try. So 2016 was filled with challenges big and small, some of which I accomplished, many (many!) of which I failed. I could call this a #fail but that’s ok because I’ll just keep up on 2017.

13. Texas

Mysteriously, I started and ended the triathlon race season in Texas. It wasn’t planned that way. I learned a lot from those trips – from racing semi-unprepared, to travelling solo, to setting goals. I’m really excited to see what 2017 brings for racing. From joining Coeur Sports, to more travel to new places, it’s looking good so far. We’ll call this a #favourite/#fail (only because I didn’t quite hit the benchmarks I’d set myself. That’s what 2017 is for).

12. Invictus

A last-minute invite to work on one of the most inspiring projects ever. I learned a lot. I got to work with old friends and make new ones. I cracked under pressure but pulled it together. I met some ginger guy that everyone knows? I didn’t sleep much. I laughed really, really, really hard. A most definite #favourite.

11. Home

Home looks and feels different these days. As parents, we finally chose to live apart and, lo and behold, the kids have adapted (as I was told repeatedly that they would). I could say something trite like “that’s a post for another day”, but it’s not, because it’s really no one’s business. When I hear things like “the kids come from a broken home”, I can tell you that you are wrong: it’s not broken. It’s fixed in a way that works for us. It’s neither a #favourite nor a #fail, it’s a #fact and a work in progress.

10. Kona

I witnessed the triathlon Super Bowl first hand (and also from the back of a motorcycle). It was an eye-opener for sure and I’ll be back, maybe as early as 2017! I just need someone I like to qualify so that I can go cheer/support/heckle #favourite.

9. Werk Werk Werk Werk Werk

I got a few new jobs this year. Some small, some dauntingly big. All I can say is that I love what I do and I am extremely lucky to be surrounded by people willing to take a chance on me #favourite.

8. La Belle Province

My favourite trip of the year was the one that took the kids and I back to Québec. Friend time, family time. A lot of time saying “Kids! This is where I used to *blahblahblah*”. It was pretty perfect #favourite.

7. Will

He’s 10 now. Beats me how that happened. I put a lot of pressure on that kid as the eldest (I’ll work on that). Most of the time, he steps up. He’s a normal, happy kid who still manages to surprise me. And dammit, he’s almost as tall as me #favourite.

6. Rory

My little Linus. He’s coming into his own as the kid who is both gentle and emotional but also? Doesn’t give a f#$%. Prototypical middle child. And the only one who doesn’t need to be reminded eleventy billion times to do something #favourite

Let’s face it; sometimes it’s about how you look!

5. Anja

My shadow. My girly tomboy. Life isn’t easy with 2 older brothers. She sails through, knocking on doors to find someone to play with. Fearless and funny, she only stops talking when she’s asleep #favourite

Of course she lost a tooth through it all

4. Adventures

I love that I don’t need much to call it an adventure. Weekend in city, lounging on Liz’s couch and riding bikes? Adventure. Hike in the rain with kids? Adventure. Putting up tents in some crazy prairie storm in Saskatoon? Adventure. I hope 2017 is FILLED with adventure #favourite

3. The world

As the kids get older, a lot of our conversations revolve around what we hear on the news, see on the TV, influence us from the outside. It’s fascinating and also a little terrifying (#trump!) But as I watch them absorb it all, I hope that their curiosity is piqued by things beyond their immediate borders. I can only hope that 2017 brings… hope #fact #fail #favourite

2. My health

I made an effort in 2016 to take better care of myself. It’s a never ending roller coaster, really. But the bottom line is, I am hella healthy. Can I do better? Obviously. Will I try? Yes. Will I fail? Probably. Will that stop me? No #fact.

1. All of it

I struggled to come up with 16 distinct “bests” of 2016. My life isn’t full of crazy highs and brutal lows. It’s up and down, for sure. But isn’t everyones? As I look back on 2016, I can see that I am surrounded by friends who love me (and keep me in line), kids who challenge me (and most days, love me), I live a life that is, quite frankly, luxurious by most standards. 2016 was really hard is some ways, really easy and fun in others.

Just like I think 2017 will be.

Day-to-day life, Kids, weekend, Whistler

Day 1

November 28, 2016 Christine Cogger

It’s pitch dark when I open my eyes. I’m still tired, congested. I’ve had the flu for a few days. I look at my watch, it’s 6:08 on a Sunday morning. Ugh.

I lie there for a minute, thinking I could probably roll over and try to sleep, but I know that won’t happen. My brain is scrolling through the Mom list: do I make lunches first? Who didn’t finish homework? And then I remember… it’s not a school day!

It’s day 1 of the ski season for us. Finally.

I try to pad downstairs quietly, but trip over the cat and the dog smashes into me and I hear Anja quietly ask if she can get up. Sure, I say.

Shortly after that, Rory joins us in wrinkled jammies and Will comes up, squinting in the light but already wearing his long underwear.

The morning is a blur. Breakfast gets half-eaten, fights ensue, socks are lost, reminders get issued. I’m thankful that I packed most of the ski stuff the night before, else you can be sure some critical piece would get left behind.

We bid the cousins goodbye and miraculously, we’re out the door at a reasonable time. Rory’s in the front seat, scrolling through iTunes so we can jam on our way to the mountain. And by jam, I mean listen to One Direction for the 100th time this weekend.

We’re all giddy.

The parking gods smile upon us and everyone is dressed and ready faster than ever. They dart through the cars, and I have to catch up to them after I lock our car and get my own stuff sorted.

We’re on the lift in no time, the kids are virtually vibrating with excitement. Naturally, we snap our first chairlift selfie of the year. My arms are short and my kids are getting bigger.

The first run of the season has to be in powder and moguls, directly beneath the lift. Obviously. Outwardly, I’m laughing and having a great time. Inwardly, I’m cursing the moguls and marvelling and how the kids seem to have secretly skied all summer.

As is always the case when we play outside, there’s virtually no complaining or fighting. I take my gloves off and adjust helmets/goggles/mitts/etc no less than 4 billion times. “But Mooooom, let’s GO!” gets yelled when I ask for another picture. My socks are so itchy, but I can’t stop because no one waits for me, anyway.

We duck the rope at the end of the day #deathbeforedownload, and I get talked into a stop at the candy store on our way home. They get their sweet tooth from me.

The drive home is a little more quiet than in the morning, but still a little giddy. We talk about the powder, “mom did you see when I hit that jump”, plan for next weekend. We share the same joy in taking off ski boots. We go out to dinner in our long underwear. The glass of red at the end of the day almost makes me forget my congestion.

Ski mom beats soccer mom every time.

Of course she lost a tooth through it all

Day 1

Aftermath

Kid deep

Day-to-day life, Kids, Random

A different kind of Mom Guilt

November 15, 2016 Christine Cogger

As I type this, the kids are downstairs playing some game that specifically excludes adults (and sounds kind of rough, but they are laughing, so I’m staying out of it).

My inbox is very much under control (it’s a quiet time at work), my workout for the day is done and the dog came with, so that’s a 2-birds, one stone kind of situation.

The house is mostly under control (I mean, I could probably do another load of laundry but whatever).

I glance around the living room as the sun sets way too early and realize, with some trepidation, that there is nothing urgent that needs my attention.

And for some reason, I feel guilty.

There’s an expectation these days that moms (and dads, or anyone, really) need to be busy-busy-busy oh-no-no-time-to-sit-down. It’s a pet peeve of mine when you ask someone how they are and the first thing they sigh is “oh, I’m just so busy!” Uh huh. Aren’t we all.

Except.

I’m not. I’m really not! I have free time. Time that I don’t feel I need to assign a task to. Frankly, sometimes I don’t know how to fill that free time. Sometimes, I am even bored. And yet, it doesn’t feel right that I have this magical unicorn kind of time.

It’s like I’m admitting something, finally coming clean:

Hi, I’m Christine and I’m not busy all the time.

Maybe I need a hobby.

Editor’s note: I even feel guilty just writing this.

Day-to-day life, Kids, Random

Sound bites of summer

August 23, 2016 Christine Cogger

“Dropping in!” (can refer to anything from trampoline time, bike rides and hurling one’s self off the top bunk).

“Mom! Watch me!” (can refer to anything from trampoline time, bike rides and hurling one’s self off the top bunk, and let’s not forget everyone’s favourite: handstands in the shallow end).

“HEY! Don’t touch my XYZ!” (any child at any given moment referring to any given thing).

“Can I have a freezie?” Rinse and repeat.

“Aw, do I have to?” (refers almost exclusively to showering).

“Can I have something to eat?” (why, why, why are they always so HUNGRY?)

“Have you seen my XYZ?” (refers to everything, including the clothes they are currently wearing.)

Parents, do you feel me?

#summer.

Quiet.

Summer.

Love.

Goals.

Memories.

Old homes.

Nope.

Given’r

Brave.

Tired.

Fearless.

Yikes

Day-to-day life, Kids, Random

Summer snippets

July 4, 2016July 4, 2016 Christine Cogger

It’s Monday. A holiday in the USA. Technically, a work day for me. The house is messy, my inbox is overwhelming me and deadlines loom.

Kids are running wild, shooting cap guns and refusing to eat the healthy snacks I put out, instead choosing to subsist on freezies and crackers.

I realized the other day that I had completely dropped the ball on summer camp registrations, and now I’m staring down a summer of kids using this house as base camp for all manner of adventures sprinkled with statements of “I’m bored”.

I honestly have no idea how parents find the time or the inclination to helicopter parent.

—

Since April, and the last race I did, all motivation to train and be fit and put in the work required to do well at the exercise contests I am so fond of evades me. Life gets in the way, excuses become too easy to concoct and the reality is that I need a carrot at the end of the proverbial stick to get myself going. Doesn’t help that my training buddies are just as busy with life as I am (I hate the “I’m busy” excuse, but we’re all prone to it) and one of them is baking a new bébé.

So I’ve taken to scouring the race calendar and trying to entice friends to sign up with me. Beware friends, my powers of persuasion will soon be turned on you…

—

Oh. Wait. I did another race. The Test of Metal ended it’s 21 year reign and I felt an obligation to take part. Was I undertrained? You bet. Did I not want to do it one bit when I woke up? 100%.

I changed my attitude on the start line and ended up having a ball. Truly. 4.5 hours of muddy good times. I won’t lie: I’m proud of myself for that one.

Before.

After.

—

This morning, I was up at 5:30, per usual. Will woke a full 5 hours later. Is 10 the new 16?

I am not ready for this.

—

I have a deep, unabashed affection for summer beach reads. Anyone in the internets have any suggestions? I just finished House of Wives and Engaged. Both highly entertaining reads.

—

Does anyone else feel like summer break totally snuck up on them this year? I survive by repeating my motherhood mantra:

Fake it till you make it.

Day-to-day life, Travel

Invictus Games 2016

May 19, 2016May 19, 2016 Christine Cogger

Snippets from my 2 weeks at Invictus Orlando:

Days were long, hot, sweaty, stressful, tiring, a mad rush, long waits, flurries of activity. I was alternately elated and frustrated, buzzing with energy and exhausted. But the Invictus Games were nothing short of inspiring and gave me a whole new level of perspective. Many of these men and women shouldn’t be alive, let alone smashing themselves in wheelchair rugby or diving into that beautiful pool.

I saw an alligator. Granted, it was from the comfort of a car going 100km/h, but now I know how tourists feel when they come to Whistler and see a bear. There was squealing.

Mickey rules all in Orlando. Including the food.

“Are you Nick’s sister?” I hear this a lot. Games gypsies are a small family. Nick led the way for me. Working these types of events allows me to meet people from all over the world and make life-long connections. Best of all, my crew was made up of 2 of my most favourite people. The late-night giggles and inside jokes were all-time.

Before the madness really set in

It rains in Florida, apparently.

#Canada

Our last event

Dream volunteers

Gary! Lifesaver.

Volunteers make the world go ’round.

Yes, I met Prince Harry. The “he’s royalty” factor wears off pretty quickly when he admits to being just another ginger suffering in the sun. His dedication to these athletes and hands-on approach was admirable and unexpected.

We invented a new game called “Spot the Secret Service”. We thought we were pretty good at it. We probably have no idea what we are talking about.

Signed by all the athletes

Is this Lady Gaga or not?

Sitting Volleyball. Amazing.

“Now, if you just sign here…”

Just another ginger with an iPhone

I didn’t run when there, but walked a touch.

We met a Harry Stalker. That was something.

I loved how family-driven this event was. Each athlete was invited to bring along 2 or 3 supporters with them. It added a completely different dimension to the Games.

The best part of being away and working myself into the ground for 2 weeks is coming home to cuddles and hugs from my people.

Invictus Toronto 2017?

Day-to-day life, Kids

In defence of average.

April 22, 2016April 22, 2016 Christine Cogger

A few weeks ago, I wrapped an event that held a whole new component for me:

Parents.

And not just any parents. We’re talking hyper-competitive, overbearing, over thinking, call-you-16-times-a-day parents. Parents that make triathletes look like acquiescent kittens. Parents of – wait for it – 12 year old athletes. 12 year olds who are meant to be participating and enjoying a once-in-a-lifetime experience. 12 year olds who are not, let’s be perfectly clear, destined to be Olympians.

Parents who seem to have forgotten what it’s like for kids to have fun.

To be fair, I probably only remember the bad ones; after all, they are the ones who make the most noise, demand the most attention and make the most waves. The good ones step up, help out and just plain old, get-the-job-done. The good ones quietly support their kids, no matter what. A quick hug, a pep-talk when needed: those are the parents I strive to emulate.

What I witnessed still boggles my mind. A father who flew out private coaches for their child; a mom who broke down in tears over her child’s seemingly poor performance. I wanted to walk up and shake them and say:

GET SOME PERSPECTIVE.

Which brings me to my whole point. I think we’ve forgotten that sometimes, it’s completely ok to be “average”. Why do all our kids need to be the next great thing?

As a mom of 3, it’s taken me a while to come around to this point of view, but since then, it’s one I totally embrace.

You know what? I’m pretty certain we aren’t raising the next Cam McCaul or the next Katie Ledecky.

And that’s perfectly, 100% ok with me.

My kids are happy to be good at what they love, to dabble in lots of different things, be lazy when they are tired, be creative if the mood strikes, to climb trees and skip homework and to be kids.

Simple, average kids.

Will I discourage them if they show interest in high-performance anything (sport is just one facet of life, let’s be perfectly clear)?

No. I will support them to the best of my ability. Will I encourage them to try new things and get out of their comfort zones? Always.

To be clear: in no way do I discourage competition (wouldn’t that be ironic, given that my favourite thing to do is race). After all, it seems like everything is a competition in this house. And generally, it’s healthy competition.

However, I’ll only push so far. I want them to have the opportunities to find what they love; to make mistakes and to fail; to conquer fears and test their boundaries and to figure out that, sometimes, being average at whatever they try is ok.

Guess how many targets he hit? Zero is a good start.

And if being so-called average means being happy, healthy and satisfied, sign me up. I’m all in.

Day-to-day life, Family, Kids

Rainy day round up

December 7, 2015December 7, 2015 Christine Cogger

It’s a rainy Sunday… the day has passed with staggering slowness. Another rain fall warning means even though we go outside, no one really loves it (not even the dog), and the lingering luxury of shooing everyone outside in bathing suits after a week in the sun is still on everyone’s mind.

I hate homework more than all of them combined.

Case in point: the eldest went to join his siblings outside… in bare feet. It took reminding him that we aren’t on holiday anymore to get his brain re-engaged.

—

“Mama, the air is all liquidy here…”

Those were the first words out of Anja’s mouth as we deplaned for our holiday together. It was late and it had been a long flight with lots of fidgeting (from me, too). I’d sort of mentally blocked the fact that even though I/We were on a lovely tropical holiday, I still had to parent.

Well, that’s novel.

And let’s be honest. There were days where the level of parenting was low. Like, take care of yourself and go ahead and ignore me, low. Nonetheless, we had a great time and each kid reacted a little differently to their time away.

Anja couldn’t get enough of sitting in the surf, filling her bikini with sand and… sleeping (that’s my GIRL!)

Rory spent hours diving under waves, wandering the beach seemingly aimlessly but always with an underlying purpose.

Will tested his limits (which is very much unlike him) and built things out of sand.

And me? I read books. And it was glorious.

—

This is a very random fact: I’ve always hated my feet. I don’t like their shape, they are usually missing one or several toenails and always, always have blisters or remnants thereof.

One evening, we were walking on the beach back from the now infamous (in our house anyway) ice cream dinner. I looked down at my foot prints in the sand and I didn’t see my own feet. I saw my mum’s. I stared for a few minutes, and realized that I can no longer hate my feet, because of who I so clearly inherited them from.

—

It’s a few weeks out from Ironman Arizona… I thought the feeling of scouring race calendars and making mental plans would dissipate. Well, what do you know. It’s still there and it’s rather strong.

Let the planning begin! (or, you know, continue… as it were).

—

Peace out, rain!

The view… from my book.

This is all right!

Every day

❤

Day-to-day life, Family, Kids

That settles that.

September 9, 2015 Christine Cogger

A few weeks ago, Will asked me if I was a “helicopter parent”. That basically stopped me dead in my tracks. Oh my god… is this what he thinks of me? Maybe he thinks because I made Anja wear all the armour over her onesie for her first foray into the bike park that I’m over protective??

To be fair, she didn't have to wear a full face helmet. — To be fair, she didn’t have to wear a full face helmet.

I asked him if he even knew what that meant. Sure, he said. It’s a parent who doesn’t let you do anything fun.

Right, then.

I followed this up by asking him if he thought this was the kind of parent I was (which would be odd, because generally I only some kind of vague idea of where the kids are at any given moment. They’re playing outside? Super! I hope they remembered sunscreen.)

No, no, he assured me. You’re pretty ok.

If that isn’t a ringing endorsement, I don’t know what is.

Fast forward to tonight. I tell the kids to go blow off some steam so I can tidy up and get ready to end the day. It’s pretty loud outside… but not tears or screams of terror so essentially, all good. I wander out onto the deck to spy on them, and… behold:

Asked? And answered.